Its My LIFE. Why do you even give a damn when you don't have one?

Thursday, December 15, 2011

Dont Wait

Miami Feringghi beach: 28112011

DontWait for ittohappen , insteadmakeit happen
bebrave and take one step.at atime
Time killedaperson.Memoriesfadebefore you even know youbeenthere.

Do you believe in waiting? waitforsomething to happen which is pretty hopeless, i learn from the best that instead of waiting, it is best to just make it happen.There is no fullstop in life and there should not be waiting in a person dictionary.Some part in life where i find waiting is just a waste of time, you expect the best but there is a question mark there?So, can you wait? Life goes on. even though it is sunshine or rain, storm or hurricane,The day will still be a day and the moon will still be up in the sky during the night and i will be still breathing.Tomorrow will be another new day and a new chapter begin.Even for the bad or good day, i just have to swallow the bitterness in life and taste the sweetness of it at same time.

Quoted by miss cat when she is 16: 'You missed your turn and there is no more waiting and wishing in life.Life is bittersweeet'

Listening to 'never says never ' by the fray and i never get enough of this song in my head. Flashback where i was this time, last year ,i was doing my internship and waiting for my last week of intern where i spend the rest of Christmas and new year celebration in Singapore
Life totally change when you meet someone, and i do have my own saying in this, People change that is true, change for a better or worst, you decide yourself, but life change when you finally meet someone with the word of love in it. Its funny how my life full of hatred and how realist i am and i finally gave up of being one. They say love is a very strong word and yes it really means a lot to me with the one word love. [ishallupdatethatverysoon]

How hypocritical one human life can be? it can be very much like a drama scene, because honestly i am so disgusted on how a person can be so judgmental a t a time. People will start judging you even before you do the bad or good and the irony part human tend to remember the dark and bad side of you rather than the good one.Start judging yourself before looking at others, the image on the mirror reflect on you back when you start judging others, know yourself better before wanna know others better.

Remember how i said i hate changes earlier? get the mix feeling when i finally have to shift out from my old house, growing up there since am 7 years old, and its not easy to abondon everything behind and move into a new place. I know there is this word GROWup, but i somehow like it to GROWsmall.Stayed there for almost 15 years and so much of memories, laughter, anger, pain, sadness, sweetness i share with my family there and moving in a new home seem so different, i somehow dont call them my home. I know its very silly of me but i am so homesick right now.i miss my home and i am coming home 2 days before christmas and when am back home, my old home is not my home anymore:( will be busy packing up my things and move to a new room. Good thing my new place is just 7 mins from my old place. I am gonna miss my neighborhood night marker, neighbor, the train, the road, the dogs, the trees, and the cat.

hahahaa.gonna get some sleep now before continue being one dasyat drama queen.

Monday, December 5, 2011

These are the days



Time flies, and we are now in last month of the year, 2011 almost set its curtain fall.
Changes, Changes, Changes : and yea i do remember how i hate changes, i prefer things to be secure most of the time. Stay the same and don't change.
Made a big decision in my life recently that changes everything that revolve around me.
Its a rather gloomy and cloudy today and Its has been 3 days that i trapped myself in my room,
basically i just dont feel like going out, 3 days of not exposing myself to the sun light and am feeling very unhealthy indeed. Anyway, it is rather windy and chilly outside the gentle cold wind brings back some reminiscent memories. Having tuna sandwich at 3am in the morning is so peaceful, im not sure what is the word am looking for but i do feel so calm now.At time i felt that am traveling too fast in a time built machine,the feeling that everything is spinning around you and your in the middle of it. Swap and wipe out into a gigantic tornado!

Its been awhile i abandon my blog, and the weather today reminded me of 12 years back. I remember how crazy i am with o-town, having their cassette playing in my walkman for over and over again, those poster that i fight with my brother on who should have it and it just bring back old school memories we had back then. The pocket money i saved up to buy their album and the craziness we had in class singing their song over and over again and fighting over team O-town and N' sync. Back then, i used to be a fan of N' sync , Westlife ,backstreet boy,blue and 5ive. I adore o-town most of all and my list of favorite song will be
1: Love is a crime
2: All or nothing
3:Baby i would
4: These are the day



'empty room like an empty heart, lover stop but they never stay, they dont look back because they drive away'- these are the days

Anyway,decided to logged into my friendster account (www.friendster.com) after so long of not bothering to do so. I miss having testimonial :( friendster kept so many memories in it, and it is my first social network page where i learn how to violate the use of internet at home. Friendstering is the first social network place where we all have fun exchanging testimonial. So much memories and the website now has been reconstruct to a new online game page. I was so shocked, that i couldnt save up any of my friendster photos. No notification was given FRIENDSTER :R.I.P .

Later on, logged into my msn messenger after 10 months of abandoning it,my account has been blocked because of security purpose. Then, logged into my another blog after years of privatizing it ,had hard time retrieving my msn password and my old blog. As i read them yesterday,i realize that i have grown in thought and emotionally am a better person now.Its funny how time made the best in you, one moment you felt like your traveling in long empty road alone and when once upon a time how i loath fairy tale and happy ending and now i start to believe in them again.

::I taste Bitter, but i somehow i taste sweetness in life, i love bittersweet ::